On Being Funny… or not

I got an observation through a friend that the Martin Family blog isn’t really all that funny. See, I’m known for being the funny guy. Well, let’s back that up. I think with the certain group of friends that read this book I might actually fill several roles. I’ll list them. Feel free to correct or interject as the case may be.

Roles:

Funny Guy
Slightly better at video games guy
The fatter one 
The bigger one 
The “why doesn’t he make more money?” one
The “he will show up when needed” one

How do I do all this? Not sure. Not even slightly sure. Throughout my mid 20s I was nasty sarcastic. I believe this was due in large part to my large ex wife. I was not a very happy or content person. Consequently, any moron who thought to have words with me quickly found themselves shutting up due to a shear acerbically bitter diatribe. Most other people found it funny… they weren’t wrong most times. However, after losing a few good people to this kind of ‘wit,’ I decided that it was best retired or at least used very sparingly.

I really should apologize and send a big thank you to all the ex girlfriends who left me due to this as well. I think without the exes that my wife and I would not get along half as well on a day to day basis. Take for instance last night. My wife was doing some dishes and cleaning up when I made a seemingly innocuous comment about nesting.

This lead to my wife asking the question, “Why is it when I do the same things I did before tax season that you feel the need to comment on it?” I’m not exactly sure what I said back but it was along the lines of being barefoot (she is whenever she can be cuz that’s how she rolls) and pregnant in the kitchen cleaning. Seriously, how much more of a setup for the spike do you need?! I am fairly certain that I was immediately hit and called a butthole. Yes, we use the word butthole. Why? Because motherf*cker is entirely too funny these days considering we are on kid #2.

Back to the ramblings, in answer to her above question I could have said something like “the very fact that you notice it as things you did BEFORE tax season should clue you in about how long ago you did them and we saw them.” That would have gotten me yelled and hurt her feelings but I could have said it in such a way that people looking in on it would have laughed ass.

All this has been leading to this. I have to be very careful about what I think is funny and how I present it on this blog. I am in danger of being killed by my wife at a moments notice for silly stuff like using the wrong packet of seasoning and delaying dinner. You don’t know what that stress is like unless you are a man of a pregnant wife.

Game demos got played a lot last night.

Wolverine – Better than the movie
Red Faction: guerilla – O hells ya.

Reading has slowed down a bit due to time constraints. Eisenhorn is still very good and starting to pick up.

A Tale of Two WoW accounts

I used to blog about World of Warcraft. I had a good many viewers although nothing like Daniel’s readership. That being said, while this is a post concerning WoW, this will not be a blog concerning WoW. Rather, it is a blog concerning the lead up for having baby the sequel.

I quit playing (again) in January of this year. I get the urge to play sometimes because it is a fun game and I like the fantasy setting. I, in no way, consider myself addicted to it… anymore that is. When I feel the need to look around some, I pimp Ray’s account. My friend Ray is the only one still playing WoW out of our guild. I occasionally log on to pitter around just a touch and look at things I have heard about.

Yesterday, I log on to his account to pitter after making sure he is not online. I look to see if any of the old guild people have been on. Sorry I missed you online Ozzy!. While I look, I notice that Sony’s toons have all been online in the last 4 days.

WTF?!

Did my wife lowball me and start playing? See, Sony likes playing WoW. I’ll go as far as to say the girl LOVES MMOs and keeps a tight reign on her gaming. She even played Warhammer online and lost a bit of time. Ah well, that’s her story to tell. Back to mine…

Her toons are online?! I check to see when her main was online. The toon isn’t even in the guild. Uh oh. HACKED!! I armory her toon and it has been transferred to a different server. Uh oh, her alts have access to the guild bank and my toon, which is guild lead, does not have an active account. Quickly throwing some money at my account, I log on and kick the rest of her toons and check the guild bank (4tabs worth) and notice nothing is gone. /whew

I make a toon on the server that Sony has been transferred to. Her main is actually online! I repress the urge to tip my hand by cussing this guy out and instead call Blizzard. First, I talk to Eric. Eric doesn’t wish to talk to me because I am not Sony. I get Sony. Sony talks to Eric and starts verifying things. After giving him 2 ½ of our original authentication keys and the random mother’s name of “I am Stupid” (Really, don’t ask.) We find out that the account got reactivated 3 days ago. He resets our password but does so before resetting our email account. Moron. He sent the temp password to the hacker! /facepalm

Call Blizz back and talk to a lady who told us what happened and then set us up properly. I log on and change the password to something using every key on the keyboard. Log on to her main and all her gear is intact. This is when I notice her low level lock has been transferred as well! WTF again? Can you guess WoW players? He paid for a bank alt to be transferred. I look on the alt and he has over 5000g and a bit more on the AH. He has been doing nothing but grinding in Sholazaar. We have been hacked by Ni Hao himself.

We now have all of Ni Hao’s AH stuff and gold. Sony left her toon with about 500g on her. No we have probably around 6k total. We read the policy about unauthorized transfers. If they transfer the toon back, it will NOT come back with the gold or the mats. We will pay the 25 to get her sent back and keep all the stuff thank you very much.

A month of WoW – 14.99
Two toon transfers – 50.00
Grinding gold farmer style for 4 days – 6000g

Getting your account BACK from the gold farmer before he has offloaded all his gold and getting to keep the spoils – Priceless

The problem with gaming

So lately I have been gaming with the MMOs a bit over the last 2-3 days. I won’t be buying any of them. While I enjoyed WAR a good bit, it very WoWesque and I am already a good deal further along in that game. There are a ton of games coming up for my 360 though. Batman looks awesome, FFXIII is close and there is Final Revenant out there.

The problem I am getting into lately is… the length of the game. Most of the action/platformers are 10-12 hours long. Let’s say I play an hour a night and maybe 2 hours a night on the weekend. I have killed the game in just about over a week. Very few games can keep my attention on the replay unless they are online and change due to other players. I love playing Halo3 online. I replayed the campaign twice and that is enough for me.

I have Warhammer: Dawn of War which was fun for about the first 10-12 missions but has now gotten to be build base, upgrade units and kick the shit out of everything. I will play through it all the way for the story but playing it again probably won’t happen. The game has got to be engaging for at least 40 hours these days or I feel that I have wasted immense amounts of money.

Luckily, I will soon be busy with manual labor in my off moments and won’t have to worry about any of this until that is over. What about reading you ask? I do read. I read fairly fast. The problem with reading is the same as the problem with in depth gaming.

“Hey dad, what you doing?”


Gotta love him :)